Just Because - Grateful

#7 coming late July

Linking up with Rosie

Seize the May

I was talking to several friends the past few days and reflecting on the next several weeks ahead. The month of May is a busy month for most I know - end of year EVERYTHING at school, spring sports, the beginning of summer and sprinkle in a birthday or two and Mother's Day and BAM your schedule can be filled to the BRIM. On top of that for me/us, Lee is not very available/present because pool season is in full swing. Thus, much of the rigmarole of May fall to MOI. 

It is kind of a grit-and-get-through-it month. It is also a month I'd in theory like to just skip because it is alot. But in my reflections and conversations, if I were to bury my head in the couch and not seize the month of May, I think I'll miss out on a whole lot. The soccer games. The birthday girl. The celebrations. The accomplishments. All because I don't have the right outlook and frame of mind. 

So the motto for May 2019 is, Embrace May and Don't Wish it Away. 

Here's to being present in May and not just rushing through it to throw the kids in bed. Here's to later than normal bedtimes and a stricter meal planning schedule. Here's to driving in many directions and being grateful for the opportunity to go to five hundred million things. Here's to Sundays and spending them with Papa. 

Here's to loving these kids - plus the two not pictured 

and teaching them what it means to be present for each other. 

May, you are going to be a busy month but we will embrace all you have in store.

Kindergarten... It's For Real

I went to my doctor appointment last week - which is probably one of the more quiet and peace-filled time of my weeks - and had a conversation similar to this:

Dr - How's Kindergarten going?
Me - It's good. E likes it...
Dr - Yeah
Me - But you know... Kindergarten... It's For Real
Dr - You need to put that on a shirt

Now I think our family (it has been a family effort here) has transitioned to Kindergarten pretty well. I held it together the first week, E's only occasional complaint is that she 'wants to spend the afternoons with {me}', and R and M have been good sports about the time schedule bump. We found someone to bring E home in the afternoons - which is such a MASSIVE weight lifted off my mind - and after nearly two weeks the morning madness seems halfway normal.

I know this hasn't been the case for every Kindergarten family. There have been more tears, more meltdowns, earlier mornings, more pull back from siblings... so let's just say that I think if I had to go through the first few weeks again, I'd do it because it wasn't as scary/terrible/sad as I thought it would be

but, But, BUT... There is one thing that I wasn't expecting.

Kindergarten is exhausting. Not just for E but for me and I'd even guess the sibs too.

Blame it on being 8 months pregnant, you could.

Blame it on having 2 smaller children, okay.

Regardless the reason, the reality of Kindergarten is setting in and I think I'll being an afternoon coffee addict before it is all said and done. Why?

1. There's projects, and homework and sight words that need overseeing - a very reasonable amount I should add but still it is an added layer to afternoon activities that wasn't there before

She'll jump on any chance to go overboard with an art project

2. There's me sitting and wondering sometime in the early afternoon - I wonder what E is doing? Is she having a good time? and saying quick prayer she is happy and that she comes home from school safely. - I'm a worrier to the CORE

3. There's the realness of elementary school. I'm not walking/dragging people up and down the hallways, chatting with teachers and other parents. I am connected at Kindergarten but is a much different way. In preschool I felt like I knew what was happening everyday. Between the daily calendar of activities, to the 500 papers that came home everyday, to the conversations I had with teachers at drop off. Now, I still get the papers but I'm lucky if E tells me who she played with on the playground.... HELLO! Can you fill me in??? I haven't seen you all day and all I get is a "School was good" unless I play 20 Questions?

4. It just feels different. More formal. More real life. More this is how it is going to be. More distance. More independence. More responsibility.

And whether anyone likes it or not, Kindergarten is for real.

It is one of those transition steps into how things really are and as we learn, succeed, and stumble through it all, for now, I think we are right where we need to be.

M getting left out of the elementary school fun 

So bring on the AR books, and the projects, and the crafts, and show-and-tells, and the class parties, and the field trips - we will get through it all even with the siblings in preschool, a brand new family member, a couple extracurricular activities, and church obligations...

We will power though one way or the other

And I know that a strong cup of coffee is a K-cup away : )

The van will never be the same... 

First Time Kindergarten Mama

I had several errands to run for work this morning and as I was driving I kept thinking to myself - E going to Kindergarten - oh yeah, I got this. Just when I thought I had it all together with E going to Kindergarten... I got put back in my place a few hours later

By none other than E's godmother who sent E some school supplies and a super sweet note that I couldn't even finish reading allowed in one sitting (actually standing in the kitchen with M screaming for food and R wailing from the garage she couldn't bring her bag in and E messing with her new pencil pouch). Usually the antics help me power through the raging emotional hormones but not today...

Finally once I re-collected myself, I (barely) finished reading E the note and we started lunch as usual and then I looked at her and thought of the note and I thought about E not being here next week for lunch because she'd be in school. Fortunately she didn't ask my why there were tears running down my face as I was eating lunch.

And then I realized I really don't have it together - at all. I mean in theory I do - but in real life I don't. It is going to be tough. I know I need to hold it together for her and R during that first week. I think R is going to lose it when she leaves her 'big sis' those first couple mornings. One morning it dawned on E that she wouldn't be around for lunch and as she was telling R this in the van, E was crying - not upset just realizing it will be different. R doesn't have any sort of concept of what this difference is going to look like or feel like but once she does that change is going to be tough.

I think E's excitement will likely carry her through the drop-offs but if it doesn't - Lord help me. I cannot stand watching my kids cry over legit emotional stuff, add on the raging 3rd trimester pregnancy hormones and I'll be a hot mess!

So I'm going to take all the time I need standing in the laundry room listening to the hum-drum of lunch or whatever else is going on - and get my tears out before the first day of school. I will hold it together only because I have to - not because I want to.

Like the note says, I hope she makes lots of friends and has fun learning and turns to her guardian angel when she's scared or confused. Go rock out kindergarten E - even though I won't there to watch over you the whole time, I won't stop thinking about what you are doing and I won't stop wondering if you are missing me as much as I'm missing you.

Answer Me This - Homes, Spicy Crickets, Messy Vans

We are still here I promise... 

1. How long have you lived in your current home?

We've lived in our house now for almost 3.5 years. When I tell people that we accidentally bought it and really didn't mean to be moving when I was 37 weeks pregnant I'm not sure if they believe me.

We stumbled across our house the Saturday after Thanksgiving when we were driving through parts of the county we knew we would like to live (aka not in the city with the CRAZY taxes and public utilities rates). This house was our last stop on the tour. We had seen neighborhoods we liked but not houses we both agreed on. Then we turned onto the street an saw this house and we both had an "Ah ha" moment.

The following Saturday we were touring the house plus two other houses that were both walking distance from it - because we just HAD to see the one house and we didn't want to waste the listing agent's time. The house wasn't perfect but it did have endless - and I mean endless - amounts of closets and storage (one of our major issues with the house we were living in), a HUGE mudroom, 3 bedrooms downstairs which left room for Papa to have an office upstairs, plus a bonus room over the garage which we knew immediately would be the chapel space. We were pretty much placing our furniture. And the other 2 houses just weren't making the makes in fact the last one literally gave Lee and I the creeps - when house hunting bringing some Holy Water to douse any necessary houses.

Well the Saturday after walked through the houses we were signing the dotted line. No joke. We were staying with my parents that weekend and we actually had to drive back to the Mount to sign the contract so it could be officially under contract.

Then we moved 3 weeks before R was born so basically I was responsible for nothing. If you want to have nothing to do with moving then move when you are pregnant - and really pregnant. Having a fantastic husband and mother in law really helps too though.

We've done a few things to the house since we've moved - here's some before pics and here's more after pics - but our house is such a great house and we happen to have some really great neighbors too.

E will tell us that she never wants to move from this house which is so nice to hear especially when I have to spin - the reason Papa works these insane hours over the summer is so that we can live in this house.

We actually went back to our old house a few weeks ago and we were all standing there - it was the first time R and M had been in the house - and I looked at Lee and asked "Can you imagine if we still lived in this house?"

There was a resounding 'No' plus he pointed out he literally would not be able to do the studies/reading/writing he is doing in that house because there wasn't the space. Funny how God (in retrospect) puts you EXACTLY where you need to be. 

2. How do you find out about news and current events?

I check out the local news station's site and CNN.com a few times a day. I TRY and stay up for the 10 pm news but Lee complains that I have the TV on and I rarely ever actually make it to the weather part - but it is kind of our running evening joke. 

3. Would you be able to make change for a twenty right now? For a dollar?

Heck no for a $20. Probably for a dollar if I was in the van and only because one time when my mom (yes, I am ashamed to say) cleaned out the van she put a tiny tupperware container in the ashtray (do they still call them that???) and that houses all my change.

My mom and I have VERY different philosophies regarding car organization - which I respect especially if she is the one who is using the van but I refuse to change my ways. She is a minimalist. I am a realist. She wants to see as little mess/stuff whatever in the car possible. I, well, need random jackets, socks, papers, shoes, books, High Fives... etc there just to survive.

Okay USUALLY it is not that bad but we do have another body a carseat and we are about to have another so... but you get the point - we have the potential...

Case in point, last night we went to church - Hello Sts. Peter and Paul - and R got tossed in the van from rest. Well guess who was not wearing socks. So we found a white sock from church on Sunday but couldn't find a match so we resorted to one of M's tiny blue socks. #winning

4. What's the craziest food you've ever eaten? 

In Mexico I've eaten spicy crickets - those were actually pretty good but lost their crunch after a few days which was a bummer.

In Guatemala, I was served this noodle soup with three or four straw like sticks protruding out from the bowl - which I didn't think much of until I got to the bottom of the bowl and BAM - its chicken feet. Which I was apparently supposed to chew on - but that was not happening. 

5. Which of the commonly removed parts have you had removed? (tonsils, wisdom teeth, appendix, etc.)

I've had my wisdom teeth taken out so there is not much to that story. 

6.  What's your favorite sport to watch on TV? 

Baseball. When we had satellite we got the Washington Nationals channel and we always had the games on at night. But the following summer the tree branches starting blocking the signal and we have to switch to cable and bye-bye Nats. So now we are stuck with whatever is on ESPN - which they really could show more games - but they don't. 

The Maiden Adventure - Our First Swim Meet

First of many I'm sure... 

Ready to take all you even though I won't jump off the blocks : ) 

E and R are just doing the pre-race/pre-scoring squad of swimmers. So it's all or nothing. One lap down the lane with the coach in the water to assist (or in R's case carry). 

They were excited other than R stating she was ready to go right after warm-ups. 

The calm before the storm...

E looked like she actually knew how to dive off the blocks... 

Despite R's tough face she would not have ANYTHING to do with them : ) 

R's face in this pic pretty much sums up my motivation for doing kid activities that take hours and hours of time... work so my kids can have moments like this : ) 

Yay swimming!

Still going... 

Ribbons after the race... which were literally strips of cut ribbon. They were excited 

Fortunately the pre-racers get to leave after they swim which was great because it was insanely hot. We did stick around for them to see a few other races (inspiration for getting better at swimming)

E wasn't convinced and I think the only thing that might convince her is the team swim suit that  I promised and will make good on if/when she joins the ranks of the racing swimmers. 

R is lightyears away from swimming the length by herself by I'm just glad she's in the water and having some fun!

Real Life - Laundry

This was from a while ago but I still LOVE it!

                                         

I have blogged a few times about the piles of laundry that gets washed on a weekly basis and the crazy amount of laundry post family trip. But here is the things... I like doing laundry. 

I like organizing the piles and loading it up. It is actually even fun to watch E help. Seriously I do not like when other people - including Lee - do laundry. It is therapuetic. It is organizable. I cannot explain it.

I like doing all the laundry on one day. Saturdays. I like to conquer all the loads and have nothing left. Again I don't know why either.

I get tripped up with a few things though. Folding is not bad but Lee's prefers if I fold immediately upon exiting the dryer as there are fewer wrinkles. Sometimes that does not always happen. 

Also it is a rare occasion that every laundry load is washed, dried, folded and put away. I usually run out of steam around 7 pm and there might be a load left in the washer and dryer until Monday.

I really really really try to not do laundry on Sundays. 

I have a policy - I will do laundry but I will not put it away. Yes I put my clothes away and the girls clothes away - for now. I do not like putting towels away but I have been caught doing it a few times.

Winter laundry is bigger - more clothes, more layers. Summer laundry is dirtier. Concrete, blue glue, mud, clay, sand, chalk - it has been on our clothes.

I have been washing a load of the girls pajamas mid-week because we layer up the girls at night and pajamas don't always smell amazing the next morning though I try and recycle if breakfast has not made it on them.

Anyone else have a laundry-loving thing :  ) 

Let's delay school over rain?!?!?

Okay so supposedly this rain could turn to freezing rain but for real!!! At at least our schools are only delayed 2 hrs instead of 3 like some other schools in counties around us. I hope everyone stays safe and parents don't get insanely frustrated as we deal with this 'Winter Weather'.

Enter tag team parenting this morning? I hope so because I have a 10 am meeting but I think Papa has to work today so this could be mildly entertaining....

Real Life - Tag Team Parenting

Who knows what I'm talking about here???

Now of course there are varying degrees of tag team parenting that make the family structure go around. You have your, "I will take one to the store while your stay here with the other". There's "will you pick something up for dinner so I don't have round up the kids and go". There's "okay I've been back there three times - its your turn to see why she won't go to sleep" kind.

As a parent of one or 10 it does not matter, we parents are all players in the tag team game.

The thought of handling the kids and the drama and the activities and the food and the bedtime is daunting - especially alone - that's not to say it cannot be done, its just a whole lotta work.

I want to share the Real Life tag teaming extravaganza that is our life - our ABC life and I would not have it ANY other way. It may be hectic around here but it's a great life.

So it all started out when I took on another job other than the good old pool store. Working for someone other than family... Don't put all your eggs in one basket! Then it was two part time jobs which was great. I could work late or go in early and no problems. Then E came along and I struggled with staying at home and daycare - ALOT. Fortunately Jibbe - yes she is great I know - and my other boss said to bring on the kid (s) and let me bring E to the office do I could work and maintain sanity - no post partum to report here. That was great until E was crawling and it seemed unfair to get to keep her in a pack and play all day so enter MMO. I knew I could not do full time daycare and I am grateful to all the moms who have their kid(s) in daycare aka the lactation consultant who I don't think I would have nursed the girls as long as I did without her help!!! I knew I could not stay home full time either. So MMO was my solution but its only half day - enter the tag team which was not fully realized until R came along and Lee and I moved from double coverage to girl-to-girl!

Example, I am getting ready for a big out of town trip and bed to run to work to go over stuff with my boss ( and it is January and Lee is not insanely busy). Tag team! Run to office for 1.5 hrs and everything is under control when girls get up from naps.


Classic tag team from way back, in a plot to get Jibbe out of Swimworld for more than 2 hrs during the summer so we can prove to ourselves and to customers that Jibbe is not the end all be all at Swimworld - even though she is and had the answer to everything and I still call her often when she is not there - Jibbe picks E up from school once a week and they romp around the Mount. Probably the single most thing E looks forward to every week - no lie. They go to Chik-Fil-A and get ice cream. They have been seen going to Target to get 'little coats' and to Tar-bough-a aka Tarboro to get Crocs - the pink ones that change to purple - in the sun. E had such a great relationship with Jibbe it almost makes me jealous - I will never know my grandparents as well as E knows/loves/adores hers. Jibbe is part of tag team parenting - one afternoon a week. I had time to myself at work before R came. Now R and I yet some time alone on Thursday afternoons even if it is at work it is nice playing chase around Swimworld or looking at City Lake or playing with the hanging bumblebee flag that she squeaks at!

Now let's not forget Grammy and Grandpa Joe they are tag teamers too now. They bravely have kept  E overnight many times. Grammy has come to the rescue and watched E when I have been out of town or when MMO is closed (those days cause me lots of undue stress - did I mention I love our routines). I remember when R was super small, E spent the night at Grammy's and Lee and I stared at each other because the house was quiet and we had one kid again - even if it was for a few hours that morning it was weird and the house was empty. Now you could even throw Uncle Kev into the tag teaming routine at Grammy's because he has graciously come to G&Gs aid to entertain E.

Then there is the day to day tag team parenting. Now this is not meant to complain - that is not the case - but honestly summer parenting can be really rough -but when your tag teamer is tied up from before the girls are up until dinnertime - 6 days a week - tag teaming is not a game that can be played. I love being able to have the afternoons - after naps of course - with the kids but those summer weeks are long ones. In reflecting on the challenges, I think if I could get dinner organized in the morning before they are up that would take some significant stress out of the summer. Around the 4-6 witching hours tag team parenting is the most necessary so if you don't have a plan to avoid the sugar crash and fill up tummies then meltdowns ensue.

Anyway, I typed part of this on the airplane on my phone and the rest at 11 pm at the hotel. Enough rambling. Y'all know what I am talking about.

Here's to tag teaming... it makes the world go round

Real Life - Funerals

Errr so this is topic that no one ever talks about but since I went to a funeral today I just have alot thoughts going through my mind...

1. I remember going to my first funeral. It was for someone's dad who died of cancer. It really puts your life into perspective went you consider cancer or a car accident ends a loved ones life sooner than anticipated 

2. I remember going to a funeral for someone who killed a parent and then committed suicide. That was a crazy funeral. Thinking that someone could be so angry and out of their mind that they would kill a parent is simply not fathomable. 

3. When my brother in I were in Guatemala we found out that our grandpa died. That was really hard being away from our parents so we really relied on each other and the group we were with to process death. I think that is something that funeral facilitate... processing death. Processing death is not easy -even if you are expecting it - especially alone so funeral allow people to gather together and support those who need it and share in the good memories of that person. I really learned that from being Guatemala - though we did not go to our grandpa's funeral - we processed his death with our group -which helped alot.

4. I went to Lee's grandma's funeral. She lived to be in her mid-90s. Funerals like that and the one I went to today remind me it is a blessing to not suffer in death because there are many people who suffer when they die. Families and friends were able to say their good-byes and the people who died likely knew it was happening so they were hopefully able to be at peace. 

5. My grandparents were entombed at Arlington National Cemetery - wow that was a site to see. Yes it was sad at the church but the whole military funeral was simply spectacular. It was really an amazing experience and one that I certainly will not forget

6. There is one funeral I have been to that absolutely changed my outlook on life. Going to a funeral for a child is something unlike anything I have ever experienced - and as a parent is just - well there are no words. No parent should have to bury their child - the words of my mom really hit home then. 

7. Burying the dead is a corporal work of mercy and it is certainly not an easy one. I don't know anyone who likes to see others cry - it is hard and at times uncomfortable. BUT... I think that if you put yourself in the other's shoes you would want the love and support to get through a sad time. Whether it is going to the hospital before someone dies, calling to see how everyone is doing, going to a funeral, sending a meal, or checking in a few days or weeks or months later - anything to help that people process the death of a loved one. 

8. I'll close on this because once the funeral is over and the visitors have returned home life goes on as it did before this person died but I imagine you are stuck trying to make sense of it. However you end up processing death you will never forget. One way that our family does not forget is going to pray at the grave of our family who have died. We certainly could and should do it more but I think that it is a great habit to get into and get the kids into. Of course we commemorate those who have died on Sundays during Liturgy but there is nothing like going to the grave and remembering that person - it is just different. 

*** Sorry for the morbid topic but the two hours in the car today really forced me to remember funerals I have been to and remember the people whose funerals I have been to. Processing death and keeping the good memories alive of those people - that is my real life at least for this afternoon it was*** 

I'll blog about something not as heavy next time but let's be real... life is heavy sometimes : )

Real Life - Christmas Cards

I figure this is a fitting topic as we are knee deep in the Christmas season...

Don't you love taking Christmas card pics?

1. To date I have mailed 130 Christmas cards, hand delivered 5 and have 4 addresses that I am missing. I have no idea the number of different states but I would guess at least 12, one card went to Canada.

2. I addressed most of our card with the family's last name - no Mr and Mrs etc. Why I have no idea...

3. I addressed a few of our cards to kids of the house - because what kids don't like receiving mail. One card was addressed to a baby who will not be born until April so hopefully her parents opened it for her and got a good chuckle.

4. I let E tell me who she wanted to send some cards to. For a few of her friends who have younger siblings we had to send them to the friend, sibling and Mama. That did not happen. She wanted to send one to a little boy in her class. Gah! Eye roll! I relented and said what the heck it is Christmas time - but come to find out she always has to sit next to this little guy during circle time... Silly 2 yr olds

5. I spent more on postage that I did on the cards...

6. The sisters pic was seriously the first pic I snapped of them. I took about fifty and all the rest were not great. But the above pic was the most hilarious pic of them but clearly I did not choose this one for the card.

7. I handwrote the addresses but printed our return address. One in red and one in green. Yes I am a Christmas nerd.

8. We have probably received about 20-25 cards. Its better to give than receive right? Seriously I think I am going to weed some names out next year only because our list is based on our wedding invitee list - and that is going to be 5 yrs old next year! gasp!!!

9. Last year we received a Christmas card the Saturday after Thanksgiving. This year I think we did not receive one until after our vacation... so around December 10. I don't send ours out until less than 7 days until Christmas. Partly an Advent thing. Partly because I usually don't have my act together!

10. I don't know if its a Mid-West thing but it seems like we get a number of the long family essays from people in the MW or roots there. I think they are AWESOME. I would not have the patience to write a page. Maybe next year I'll include a link to the blog on the card... NOT!


To reminiscence on Christmas cards of the past... and this years. Who knows what the cards of Christmas future will hold!

Christmas 2010

Christmas 2011

Christmas 2012

Real Life - Let's Give this a Whirl

Let's give this Real Life thing a whirl because I enjoyed reading Kate's post and its Thursday and I have a two yr old with my mother in law and a baby who is supposedly down for a nap but is currently talking to her monkey and baby. Here's to taking off the mask!

1. I don't do the cooking around here. Lee is the chef. I will fill in the gaps over the summer and might even pull out a recipe book - my mom has given me at least two and everything sounds easy in theory - but really cooking with a toddler and infant is not the easiest thing in the world. I think I am going to have to step up my game come next summer because our head chef will be back to late evening arrival again.

2. While we are on the topic of food - I love black beans. I mean seriously could eat them once or twice a week and would not have a problem with it. I think I left part of my tummy in Guatemala. I am joyfully passing on this taste for black beans to my girls - much to Lee's dismay - last night E had two black bean burritos and R had three helpings of black beans! I should mention Lee abhors black beans and will not go near them!

3. I really have gotten used to / LOVE our minivan. Gasp! Seriously if you have kids you need one of those things.

4. I think I would go crazy or broke if I had not discovered MMO. Being able to work part time and stay at home part time really enables me to be a mom and have goals and responsibilities outside of the kids. Ever so grateful for my understanding/flexible employerS.

5. My only qualm with being married to a deacon is that it means one less set of hands on Sundays - and it seems that my kids are at their worst during church. Lee has told me it only seems like they are worse because I want them at their best. That does not make the situation any better though. Thank goodness for the ladies who let me pass off E or R so I can tend to the other!

6. I cannot stand stop lights. I cannot explain why. I mean of course I like them in principle and the traffic efficiency that they create - but there is nothing like waiting at a stop light! Though one of the benefits of the Mount versus Raleigh-world is that the Mount has way less stop lights!

7. If you had asked me when I started college what I would be doing with my life I probably would have told you I wanted to be a nun and live in another country - living the charism of nuns like Mother Teresa. Husband and kids were not even on my radar screen...

8. I am not crafty. The most craft thing I do are the cross stitch stockings. I never lifted a needle (other than to sew a hole or button) until I started E's stocking - much to everyone's disbelief. Now cross stitching has taken the place time of reading.

9. When I am alone in the car I like to roll down the windows and turn the radio up and blast the music and sing along - and yes I have done this on several occasions in the van. I even will go past the house and down the road just to finish the song - if its a good one

10. I rarely wear makeup - even to work. Its not even like I think its a ton of work - I can never get my eye make up right and I happen to find that insanely frustrating

11. My first road race was a marathon. I have not done one since and the only reason I would want to run one again would be to qualify for Boston. I have run a few half marathons for which the training is so much more manageable.

12. To round off the top twelve, I like to sing when I run. Its crazy. I am sure my neighbors think I am crazy. I know it is horrible for my breathing but sometimes I just don't care : )

Cheers!